What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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