And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize