hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
