so explain again why im purple
no
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Randomize
