Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
