i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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