I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
