so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Bring me that man meat
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
