Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
