Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
