Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Randomize
