she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Randomize
