and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
