i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
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