I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
