Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
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