We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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