yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Randomize
