i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
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