STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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