everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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