Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
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