I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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