Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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