Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I'm sobbing to NWA
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
