# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
