So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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