I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
