i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
