Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize
