Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
