Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
