I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
