Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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