Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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