Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
