Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
