nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
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