the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Randomize
