so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize