all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize