i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
