i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
