forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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