Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Randomize
