I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
