Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize