Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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