New invention idea: vibrating tampons
everyone is single if you try hard enough
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
