Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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