I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
