New invention idea: vibrating tampons
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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