My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
