at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
He? As in you personified your dick?
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Randomize
